


One Step at a Time

by themerrygentleman



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Pre-Relationship, of a sort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-14
Updated: 2014-07-14
Packaged: 2018-02-08 19:37:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1953585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themerrygentleman/pseuds/themerrygentleman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Simmons decides that if a night of ice cream, conversation, and cheesy movies is standard procedure after a breakup, it should help cheer Skye up after everything she's been through lately, too. Set shortly after the Season 1 finale.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Step at a Time

“Skye?”

The voice, accompanied by a soft knock on the door, startled Skye out of a reverie. She’d been reading through a long list of recently-declassified SHIELD intel on her laptop, checking for any dangerous HYDRA-related loose ends, but her eyes had long since glazed over, and the words scrolling past on the screen had stopped making any sense whatsoever. She’d been on the verge of falling asleep on her keyboard— _again_ —before the interruption.

“Yeah? Hello? What’s going on?” Skye could feel her heart pounding—even after a few quiet days at the base, she still felt constantly on edge, like she’d have to run for her life at any second. She had the feeling it would take a long time for that instinct to subside.

If it ever did.

She scrambled to her feet and opened the door, trying to shake herself awake as she went. Jemma Simmons was standing in the doorway of Skye’s room, holding something or other in both hands. Even in the semi-darkness, her expression was visible: a nervous smile that didn’t seem like it matched any kind of dire emergency.

“Oh, hey, Simmons,” Skye ventured, letting out a relieved breath ( _okay, I guess no running for my life this time)_. “What’s up? What’s that you’ve got there?”

“It’s…well, it’s ice cream, actually,” said Simmons a bit breathlessly. “I think it’s butter pecan. I raided the fridge. Er, not the Fridge, as in SHIELD’s top-secret storage facility—Agent Koenig’s fridge in the kitchen. I mean, you probably knew what I meant, but what with the way our lives have been going of late, I suppose it’s never a good idea to make assumptions and…”

She was talking just as rapidly as she always did whenever she was explaining something technical to Coulson, and Skye had already started feeling lost. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down,” she said, putting up her hands. “What are you _specifically_ doing outside my door with a container of ice cream in the middle of the night? I mean, not that it’s ever a bad time for ice cream, really, but still.”

Simmons coughed and looked away, which just confused Skye even further. “Well…you know I’m not very good at lying or…or even improvisation, or any of that sort of thing.”

A vivid vision flashed across Skye’s memory of the disaster that had unfolded when the two of them had tried to bluff their way past Agent Sitwell and hack into classified SHIELD files. “Yes, and…?”

“I always feel better if I can figure out what to do and prepare beforehand. And, well…the cultural conventions for helping a close friend through a tragic event involve sharing ice cream and talking, and offering hugs and sympathy. And sometimes also watching terrible movies as an entertaining distraction.” Simmons held up a handful of DVDs. “Also Agent Koenig’s—I figured we couldn’t risk an Internet connection for Netflix. Apparently he has a taste for awful old monster movies—we could laugh at the scientific inaccuracies together, I thought, and take our minds off of…of things.”

Skye’s sleepy brain had finally caught up to what Simmons was saying, but she had no idea how to react for the time being. She’d thought she was prepared for anything—up to and including a full HYDRA invasion and the Clairvoyant rising from the grave—but she hadn’t been expecting something like this at all. She just blinked at Simmons, mouth slightly open, all too aware that she probably looked like a total idiot.

“I know that this sort of thing is usually supposed to happen after breakups, and I suppose that isn’t really applicable here—Ward was your SO but he wasn’t…um…your S.O. Not as far as I know, at least. But…I’d been meaning to do something for you because you’ve obviously been through a lot, but I never knew how to bring it up, and I thought planning it all out in advance would help, and…” Simmons trailed off, took a long look at Skye’s face, and winced. “…and this was obviously a terrible idea. I’m so sorry, Skye…”

“Simmons,” Skye said quietly, but the flustered biochemist was still busily backpedaling and didn’t notice her interruption.

“…didn’t mean to intrude on you, obviously you’ve got more important things to think about, and I’ll just show myself out now…”

“ _Jemma._ ”

Simmons had been halfway out the door, but she stopped, looking a little startled—it was something of a rarity for anyone besides Fitz to use her first name.

“Take a breath and stop worrying, okay? I didn’t mind. I was just…surprised.” Skye did her best to push aside the exhaustion and the grief and the uncertainty and give Simmons one really genuine, encouraging smile. “This is actually really nice of you. And I think you’re right, I could use something like this right about now. So…thanks.”

Simmons’ face lit up with a relieved grin, and Skye found that maintaining her own smile suddenly felt just a little bit easier. “You’re more than welcome, believe me. This was the least I could do, what with everything you’ve…I mean…with Ward and…” Simmons’ smile slipped for a second, but she shook her head and adopted a more forcefully cheerful tone. “Well, I suppose we can talk about that over the ice cream, if you want.”

“I do want. Come on, let’s go.” Skye followed Simmons out of her room and towards the base’s kitchen, trying her best to move silently and not wake anyone else up. _It’d be just great having Koenig find us and kick us out in the snow for stealing his ice cream. Or worse, if it was May…_

Something else was bothering her, though, something deeper than that, prodding quietly at the back of her mind as she watched Simmons bustling about the kitchen in search of bowls and spoons. When it finally hit her what it was, she suddenly felt the prickling of tears at the corner of her eyes, and her heart went through what felt like a slow backflip.

Simmons, her eyes as sharp as ever, noticed right away. “Everything all right?”

Skye swallowed heavily and fought back those threatening tears. “Jemma, I…”

She had to pause while her heart made a few more disconcerting maneuvers. _Keep it together, Skye, dammit! You will not cry, you will NOT…_

“You’re doing all this,” she finally managed, “just to—to try to make me feel better, but _you’ve_ been going through all of this, too. Ward betraying us, Garrett and HYDRA, all of our lives in danger…hell, Ward dropped you and Fitz in the freaking _ocean_ , and Fitz is still totally out cold, and even though you’re dealing with all of that….”

She could feel the last of her composure ebbing away. Her voice broke the second she tried to start talking again. “…even with all that…you wanted to do something nice for…for _me_.”

And that was it. Skye collapsed, burying her head in her arms and leaning into the counter, and gave into the sobbing that was already shaking her whole body. She took a broken, shuddering breath, feeling hot tears streaking down her face, and tried to pull herself together, but for the moment, she just couldn’t.

Somehow, after it all—the betrayal, the constant danger and death all around her—there was nothing more devastating than a simple act of honest kindness.

After a few moments, she became aware of the gentle pressure of Simmons’ arms around her. “It’s all right, Skye,” Simmons told her in a whisper, although her own voice sounded more than a little shaky. “It’s all right…”

“I’m okay,” Skye finally managed, once the tears had died down a bit. “You don’t have to try to…I mean, you’re a biochemist, not a therapist. I’m fine, seriously…just give me a second.”

“ _Skye._ I don’t need any formal training to exercise my basic powers of observation and conclude that you are far from being entirely fine. And I…I mean...I understand, I do. So take as much time as you need, all right?”

“I know the Doctor Simmons voice when I hear it,” Skye said, and managed a small, teary grin. She stayed right where she was for a few more minutes, focusing on breathing steadily and evenly, and Simmons made no move to break her embrace.

Finally, Skye pulled away and gave Simmons a reassuring glance. “Sorry about that. Guess I’m still falling apart a little too easily these days.”

As she took a longer second look at her friend, Skye felt a stab of guilt for breaking down so completely in front of her. Simmons didn’t look much better than Skye felt—she was deathly pale, had a redness around her eyes that suggested recent crying, and her usually immaculate hair was kind of a mess. The last time Skye had seen Simmons looking like this had been during the terrifying day of the alien virus—when Simmons had been convinced she was about to die at any moment, and had jumped out of a plane to try to save the rest of the team.

The comparison didn’t feel particularly encouraging.

“It just…just kind of hit me all of a sudden, okay?” Skye said, looking back at Simmons and feeling her stomach do a nervous flip. She was all too aware that articulating exactly what she felt wasn’t going to be easy. “Your life is just as crazy and terrifying as mine is right now, but here you are going out of your way to be nice. I was…touched. And impressed.”

“Well, I always feel better if I know I’m helping someone else,” Simmons said. “No point sitting around feeling sorry for myself when I can make myself useful, I think. And anyway…” she smiled, a bit ruefully. “If I’m honest with myself, maybe I was trying to kill two birds with one stone, as it were. I’m sure I’ll benefit from…all of this…” she swept her arm around in a gesture that encompassed the ice cream, the darkened kitchen, and Skye—“Just as much as you will.”

“I like that,” Skye admitted. “We can help each other out.”

Simmons pushed a bowl of ice cream over to Skye. “Meanwhile, let’s get to this before it melts, shall we?”

An hour slipped away, and a good chunk of Agent Koenig’s ice cream supply disappeared along with it, as Skye savored a feeling that had been all too rare lately—hanging out, no pressure, with someone she cared about. It felt almost… _normal,_ just two women in their pajamas spending a Friday night staying up to all hours and chatting. As long as she ignored the part where they were both secret agents living in a heavily fortified hidden base, anyway.

Both of them instinctively stuck to lighter topics at first. Skye reminisced about the prank war that had broken out within the team a while back, and how Agent May had gotten the last laugh; Simmons told Skye about the time she’d pretended to be Agent Coulson’s daughter while undercover, and Skye reduced Simmons to helpless laugher with her (admittedly terrible) impression of Fitz. (“You’ve been living on the same plane with him for more than a month,” Simmons said, shaking her head and wiping a tear away from her eye, “so how is it that you _still_ have no idea what his accent sounds like?”)

All the same, Ward’s betrayal and Fitz’s uncertain fate were never too far away from Skye’s mind, and she had the feeling Simmons felt the same way. As the night wore on, she started to feel uncomfortably like she was avoiding the topic, and resolved to at least try to say _something._

“You know what I really like about you?” she asked Simmons, trying to keep her tone light. _Guess this is as good a way as any to start._

“What?”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

Simmons’ brow furrowed in bewilderment. “ _Excuse_ me?”

Skye could feel her face turning red. _Wow, okay, that was smooth._ “Well…maybe that’s not quite what I meant. But…I mean…look. I was close to Ward, okay? Or I thought I was. And then it turned out that all of it was a lie. And I’m trying not to let it mess with me too much, but ever since he betrayed us…”

Skye took a deep breath—she didn’t like admitting this next part, even to herself. “Well, there were a few moments there when we thought Fitz was the traitor. Or May. And I’d love to say that I know them and I care about them and—hell, they’re the closest thing to family I really have—and I know they’d never betray me. But I thought all of those things about Ward, too, and look where that got me.”

“I know,” Simmons replied, after a few moments of glum silence. “I think we all felt that way—to an extent—but of course with you and Ward, it was different.”

“But _you_ …I mean…” Skye didn’t really feel like properly smiling, but the corner of her mouth at least twitched a little in that direction. “You don’t have a dishonest bone in your body, I’m sorry. Your heart is totally on your sleeve all the time.”

“I _know,_ ” Simmons sighed. “It can be mortifying, believe me. And highly inconvenient.”

“I bet. But still…at a time like this…I kind of appreciate it. I don’t think I’ll ever doubt where you stand. I’m used to having to just look out for myself, but as long as you’re around…I know I can count on you, too. And that counts for a lot. It…makes me feel safe. So…you know…thanks for that.” Skye let out a long breath. Her face was burning, and a part of her just wanted to run away and hide somewhere, but she’d said what she wanted to say.

When she finally got the nerve to look back up, she found Simmons looking back at her with a quiet smile on her face. “Well, I suppose making you feel safe is what a good SHIELD is supposed to do, yes?”

In spite of herself, Skye suddenly had to hold back laughter. “Has anyone told you lately that you’re a complete dork, Jemma?”

“I believe you have, yes,” Simmons responded primly, showing no outward response to Skye’s badly stifled giggling fit. “Just now, actually.”

Their eyes met, and Skye’s laughter turned into a contented smile. She was never going to admit it out loud, sure, but Simmons’ SHIELD comment had actually been kind of…touching. As cheesy as it was.

“Movies?” she asked, after a moment.

Simmons grabbed the stack of DVDs and nodded. “Movies.”

* * *

 

“No, see, I completely understand your point about the sword. I’m just saying that the very concept of creatures of that size with acid-based blood presents a staggering number of logistical difficulties. Now, on the other hand, it’s entirely possible that it’s actually some sort of completely alien substance with corrosive properties, but different from actual acid in some…fundamental…structural…”

Simmons trailed off in midsentence, stumbling over the last few words, and went a bit red in the face. Skye was guessing that this had something to do with her current position: somehow, without ever consciously moving, she’d ended up very close to Simmons— _practically wrapped around her, actually,_ she realized, a little sheepishly.

“You don’t mind, do you? Sorry, it’s kind of a reflex. I get really cuddly when I’m sleepy; I’m like a cat. And anyway, you’re cute when you go into Biochemist Mode.” As she said it, though, she automatically started disentangling herself from Simmons and scooting away. Whatever was going on this evening, exactly, she definitely didn’t want to ruin it.

“What? Oh, no, it was nice, don’t worry. I guess I just wasn’t expecting it. You can come back over here.” Simmons’ face turned slightly red again. “I mean…if you want.”

Skye happily complied, and they ended up watching the rest of the movie curled up together.  Despite the sleepiness constantly threatening to overwhelm her, Skye found herself enjoying it all far more than she’d expected to. The movie was entertaining and just the right kind of cheesy, snuggling up to Simmons was ridiculously warm and comfortable, and for the first time in far too long, everything just kind of felt…okay.

They stayed there for a while after the movie was over, still curled up together in companionable silence, and Skye got the feeling that both of them were more than a little reluctant to leave.

“Hey…um…Jemma?”

“Hmm?” Simmons sounded like she was very nearly asleep, and Skye felt just a little bad for waking her up again—but what she had to say definitely felt important.

“Just…I wanted to thank you for all of this again.”

“It was my pleasure, Skye, really. It was the least I could do after…everything.” Skye could hear the smile in Simmons’ voice, and it made her smile in return.

“And…um…I just…” Skye felt a lot like she was at the edge of a waterfall and about to fall over, but she gritted her teeth and took a deep breath. _Okay, come on, you started the sentence, no going back now._

“I...uh…Jemma, you really do mean a lot to me and I guess I just wanted to make sure that you know that, and…”

“Skye.” Simmons pulled herself up into a sitting position and shook her head slightly. “The last time someone said something like that to me was…well…at the bottom of the ocean a few days ago, and I…I mean, as I’m sure you’re aware, that didn’t turn out too well.”

“Oh. Yeah. Right.” The part of Skye that just wanted to crawl away and hide in a dark corner was suddenly getting very loud and assertive. “I—I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I just…”

“No, I…I didn’t mean to, I just…” Simmons looked about as lost as Skye felt. She gestured vaguely for a moment, as though trying to pull the right words out of midair, then threw up her hands. “I know what you meant, Skye…at least I think so…and it was appreciated, and I certainly didn’t mean to…um…shut you down or anything. I just think I’ve had quite enough of big, dramatic confessions for the time being. Best to take everything in life one step at a time, wouldn’t you say?”

“Definitely. You know me—I hate planning ahead.” Skye felt like she’d just gone through at least one roller coaster. But all things considered, she couldn’t blame Simmons, and the conversation probably could have gone a lot worse.

“I wasn’t really trying to make it a big, dramatic confession,” she mumbled. “I just…wanted you to know that you’re appreciated, okay?”

 _Loved,_ corrected part of Skye’s brain quietly.

 _Shut up,_ said another part of Skye’s brain, just a little more loudly.

“Yes, I think I got that.” Simmons still looked a little flustered, but not unpleasantly so. “And reciprocally, you should know that you’re appreciated too, Skye. Very much appreciated.”

“Thanks.” Skye stole a look at the clock on her phone and bit back a curse. “ _How_ is it this late already? Oh, God, I _so_ don’t want to get up and go to bed. Can I just fall asleep right here?”

“I…um…suppose I don’t mind if you don’t,” Simmons replied in a very small voice, not meeting Skye’s eyes. It was almost too dark to tell, but Skye had a feeling her face was in the process of turning very red.

Skye’s heart seemed to forget how to beat for a few seconds, and she stayed where she was in silence until it started working again. “I…I thought you said you didn’t want to…”

“ _One step at a time_ was the phrasing I believe I used,” Simmons clarified, stuttering over her words a little. “And this already seems to have turned into a sleepover of sorts, anyway, and this sofa is much more comfortable than the beds we’ve been assigned, and, er, I mean…”

“Shut up and let me sleep,” Skye murmured, burrowing into the cushions. And if that action happened to lead to her snuggling a little closer to Simmons, as well, that couldn’t be helped.

“Goodnight,” Simmons replied. Skye drifted away from consciousness with a smile on her face, and somehow, she had the feeling that Simmons was smiling too.

* * *

 

 “All of the butter pecan? _All of it?_ Really? I invite you into my base, I give you lanyards, and now, just a few days later…I don’t suppose you’d care to explain how this happened?”

The irate tones of Agent Billy Koenig jolted Skye awake, and after a brief moment of panicky disorientation, she remembered where she was: the sofa in the lounge, still curled up with Simmons. Apparently, their theft had not gone unnoticed.

 _Damn,_ she grumbled silently to herself. _Just when I thought I was getting better at the whole secret agent thing…_

“It was…um…it was HYDRA’S fault,” Simmons blurted out, wide-eyed, her usually neat hair a rumpled mess. Despite the painfully unconvincing lie, Skye had to admit that Simmons looked unfairly adorable at that particular moment.

“Okay, sure,” Koenig muttered, voice laden with sarcasm. “I have a lie detector, you know. A really good one. You know, I really should make _you_ do the next supply run, buy your own ice cream; that’d be poetic justice…”

And he wandered off in the direction of his office, still muttering under his breath.

Skye glanced over at Simmons, trying to keep a straight face. Simmons, however, was clearly also holding back an immense fit of giggles, and just a few seconds of eye contact was all it took for both of them to break down. They collapsed together into helpless laughter, still holding on to each other, until they were both red in the face and out of breath.

“We really need to do this again sometime,” Skye said after they’d gotten some degree of composure back. “What with, you know, all the double agents and supersoldiers and explosions and everything, I think I need…well, something like this every now and then.”

“I agree completely,” Simmons replied immediately, giving Skye a warm smile. “But let’s get our own ice cream next time instead of stealing Agent Koenig’s, all right? I don’t want to be kicked out of SHIELD for dishonorable conduct…”

“Can they even do that? SHIELD is, like, about six people right now.”

Simmons put her hands on her hips and affected a supremely unconvincing severe tone. “Well, I don’t want to find out the hard way! If we’re going to be starting all over, we should do it right, don’t you think?”

“Stealing the ice cream was your idea in the first place!” Skye protested, throwing up her hands. “Don’t look at me.”

“Well…it was probably your rebellious influence, then. This sort of thing just keeps happening when you’re around!”

“Oh, okay, that’s nice. You’re gonna blame me for something you did of your own free will?”

“Well…that’s not…I didn’t…I mean…obviously I…er…”

Skye had to fight the urge to laugh again. “You’re adorable, you know that?”

Simmons turned a truly impressive shade of magenta and stopped talking altogether.

“And for the record?” Skye said quietly into the sudden silence. “I don’t think we could have picked a better way to start things over right.”

They left the lounge together, identical expressions of quiet contentment on their faces. Two other SHIELD agents, who had just so happened to enter the lounge at precisely the right moment, watched them go. One of them nodded in satisfaction.

“You owe me twenty bucks,” Melinda May told Phil Coulson.

“I do not,” Coulson objected. “It’s not like it’s official yet.”

May sighed. “Look at them. You’re prolonging the inevitable.”

“It ain’t over ‘til it’s over...”

And with that, they turned and headed off in opposite directions. There was, after all, a great deal of work to be done, and if SHIELD was to be rebuilt from scratch, there was only one way to do it.

One step at a time.

**Author's Note:**

> I recently watched all of Agents of SHIELD, season one, and got far more invested in all of the characters than I'd planned to. It was a situation that cried out for the writing of fluffy, emotional fanfic, all things considered.
> 
> I hope everyone noticed the Pacific Rim reference, not that I was particularly subtle about it. I really ought to write a whole Pacific Rim AU for the SHIELD team, but that's a story for another day...


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